I’ve been thinking a lot about my dark passenger lately—my own internal whip, always at my back. It’s a concept I borrowed from Dexter, the iconic series where the protagonist struggles with an inner force that drives his actions. While Dexter’s passenger leans into the macabre, mine feeds an insatiable hunger for productivity, creativity, and—sometimes—peace. Watching the latest Dexter series has brought this metaphor sharply into focus, especially with a new season on the horizon this summer.
For me, this passenger isn’t a villain but a relentless companion. It’s inherited, I think—a family legacy. My grandfather was the kind of man who could dream up a neighborhood and turn it into a reality. His ideas were boundless, his desires endless. My father followed in his footsteps, building and creating with the same tireless energy. And here I am, walking a similar path, though I sometimes wonder if I’ve leaned more into my dad’s footsteps than my mother’s emotional nature.
My dark passenger is my salvation and my tormentor. It whispers new avenues to explore, skills to master, and challenges to conquer. But it also lashes at me, demanding more, always more. When will I reach the peak of my productivity? When will I achieve the height of relatability as a writer, teacher, creator?
There’s a restlessness it brings, a need to chase the next story, the next big idea. Sitting still feels like unraveling. Clarity slips through my fingers when I’m idle, replaced by a gnawing sense of stagnation. I wonder: is this constant rat race just a marker of being in your 40s? Or is it deeper than that—woven into the fabric of who I am, a shadow trailing me through every phase of life?
As I wait for the next chapter of Dexter’s journey this summer, I can’t help but reflect on how we all have passengers of our own. Mine keeps me moving, but at what cost? Is it truly salvation to be driven like this, or is it a slow erosion, one small piece of myself at a time?
For now, I keep chasing. Because if I stop, I’m not sure who I’ll be without the weight of my passenger.
“Fear is the first crack, Salome.”
When Nahor’s mystical barrier begins to fail, Princess Salome ventures beyond its safety. Joined by Prince Nmzar and Captain of the Lystran Guard, Reuben, she faces the Riven—a force that twists land, creatures, and minds. To save her home, Salome must confront the shadows and risk everything.
Rosemary Draven 